Let Curiosity Be Your Guide

As we move through life we are continually learning, growing and evolving. There is an ebb and flow, times when we absorb, times when we percolate and times when we put our new learning into action.

As I reflect back on my own life there are threads that cleverly weave their way through.

Twenty something years ago I studied reflexology and anatomy. I didn’t want this to become a trade as such, I was simply curious about learning more.

This then lead onto learning about other holistic treatments, such as herbal and plant medicine, chakra healing, meditation and mindfulness all great for health and wellbeing that go into my own ‘pot of wisdom’ for my own life and work today.

Nothing is ever wasted. The knowledge we gain is unique to us.

Sometimes it isn’t immediately obvious why we are drawn to learn more about something. But it’s up to us to follow the nudges.

Now this year I am immersed in learning and understanding the benefits of sound healing and participating in gorgeous sound baths. Just because curiosity led me to. And we received a gorgeous sound bowl as a gift.

Maybe this will be something I offer in the future?

Or maybe this is only for me?

Either way it all goes into my own life wisdom.

So instead of wondering what you ‘should’ be doing, consider what nudges your curiosity?

What do you naturally feel drawn to?

What is in your own true nature?

And as you learn allow your new buds to gently, grow, bloom and transform before you.

Let your curiosity be your guide.

Every Moment Matters

Every moment matters.

Every hour spent matters.

Every day matters.

Every week matters.

Every month matters.

Every year matters.

What you choose to do matters.

How you choose to BE really matters.

This new year has been a time to celebrate the moments and for deep reflection. Life does not suddenly change the clock strikes midnight and a new year begins again.

So a simple question is:

What truly matters to you here and now?

What doesn’t?

The biggest takeaway for me from 2022 was a reminder, yet again, despite all best laid plans life has other things for you to deal with that change and shift the trajectory of your life can in a moment. And getting used to uncertainty is the only thing we can control.

Tomorrow is not guaranteed, therefore where and how you choose to spend your precious time and energy matters. Every single day. Not just on the 1st January.

So cherish the ones you love and don’t forget to cherish you too. All that you have been, all that you are and all that you are becoming. This matters.

We are still immersed in winter, a time of retreat, inner reflection and replenishing.

This is not the time to push, strive or put enormous pressure on yourself to change your entire life!

So take your time, pause, rest and reflect.

This is time for you.

I wish you a happy and healthy new year and celebrate you, your loved ones and each and every precious moment.

You made it through another year and to the here and now, somehow this is really all that matters.

Taking Steps Towards Healing

The theme this year for Baby Loss Awareness week is ‘Stepping Stones - looking at this unexpected path through life that comes after loss’. So here are some of my own insights, as following the loss of our angel Grace Rose in 2015 I unexpectedly found myself on another life path that I’d never envisaged.

Allow yourself to grieve

We don’t need to wait for permission from anyone else, especially if they have never lost their own child.

Feel what you feel without justification. For as long as it takes.

This is a step-by-step ongoing process.

Grieve and grieve some more

I was once told by a friend that she thought I was depressed.

Depressed no. Grieving yes.

Grief naturally follows any loss. You cannot bypass this complex range of emotions. And your grief remains personal to you.

Given time it shifts and changes, as do you, however this is always something you learn to live with. Not get over.

We still do not give others the support and acceptance to grieve their losses.

And so this is one of the areas I continue to feel very strongly about and write about this in more detail in my book.

Grief, healing and transformation are repeatedly interchangeable. Not a linear process, and require ongoing healing support for mind, body and soul.

Walking in nature is my go to therapy.

• Gentle movement helps shift stagnant energy and trauma.

• Mindful awareness of our surroundings takes us out of the mind chatter and firmly into the present moment.

• Focusing on where we are in the moment gives us a break as we allow what is and what we feel to just be, step by step.

In the days after we lost Grace, I’d walk. Often heading out in the dark, alone, I didn’t want to see or have to speak to anyone else. This was my time. Each day I’d feel physically stronger and walk a little more. I didn’t realise the importance of this at the time, but this enabled my body, mind and soul to gently process the intense grief and begin to heal.

Gradually I’d notice the light coming my way. Fairy lights, Christmas twinkling lights, then the stars in the nights sky. I’d do my best to seek out glimmers of light. A little more each day.

This seemingly simple act of movement, mindful walking and light seeking became a pivotal ‘stepping stone’ on my own path to healing. And is self care for me and something I continue to enjoy doing today to bring me firmly back to myself, in the moment whatever life is throwing at me.

Wherever you go come back to your breath

We hold tension and trauma within our bodies and following a loss this tends to be in the chest. Heartache is a literal symptom and our lungs are severely weakened.

Another transformative stepping stone for me after the loss of Grace was the healing power of breath work.

At the time I hadn’t consciously realised how much tension and trauma I held on to. My chest felt like it was wrapped tightly in rope. Only taking shallow breaths, afraid to let go.

Learning how to breathe deeply and mindfully aids a frazzled nervous system and is restorative, as well as moving and releasing pent up emotions.

As well as physically moving our bodies, we need to release and move energy and trauma from within.

Being still may feel like the last thing you want to do, however with practice your breath has the remarkable power to heal body, mind and soul.

All you have to do it get comfortable, be still, bring your awareness to your breath. Tune out for a while. And breathe in for four and release for four. Repeat.

Notice where are you holding tension in your body?

• Can you breathe into this space?

• Can you allow yourself to feel what is?

• Can you allow whatever is there to arise and release?

• Can you let go?

Yes you can.

Surrender, release and breathe. One moment at a time.

Breath work becomes an anchor and is something I choose to do now, especially when life feels overwhelming. Come back to this moment, come back to your body. Come back to you.

Rituals and the Roses

Creating and establishing our own rituals can be comforting, especially following loss.

My own rituals were unintentional at the time, however now on reflection I can clearly see they were and are an essential stepping stone to healing and feeling an ongoing deep connection with Grace.

The love of roses is embedded in my family and DNA. It is no longer a coincidence that our house is called ‘Rosewood’, our garden is filled with established and new roses and the rose is something that powerfully fascinates me. I’ve also spent time learning about the ancient history of the rose and sacred geometry.

In my book I share the story of our roses, how they came to be and the rituals and ceremonies behind every rose.

You live with your loss every single day. Not only on anniversaires or special occasions. And so seeing the roses bloom throughout the year feels cathartic. Magically appearing when you need them in special moments.

Every year I can’t help but buy another one, this year ‘Sweet Child of Mine’ found me. A beautiful vibrant orange rose, perfect for healing and resonates with the sacral chakra, lower pelvis and womb and processing emotions.

Many roses have names and so of course we also have the ‘Grace Rose’ and ‘Amazing Grace’ in our garden.

So why not create your own rituals? Maybe you have already without realising their significance?

• Your rituals are simply precious things or ceremonies that resonate and bring comfort to you.

• You instinctively know what feels right to you. Follow where you are guided.

• Your rituals are there to bring you meaning and feel at peace.

Inside the house I also have altars, filled with special crystals, trinkets and things that are meaningful for me.

I share more about my own path to healing in my book ‘Living With Amazing Grace - a journey through grief, healing and transformation, you’ll find it here.

Go gently and seek the glimmers of light. They surround us all.

Move With The Seasons

As we move with the seasons shifting into autumn is something I have had to find a way to embrace. The shorter, darker days used to fill me with dread. But now I work on noticing what Mother Nature does. I follow her lead. And we’ve certainly had a long hot summer this year haven’t we.

Now I choose to seek out more of what I like about this time of year. Changing and adapting the food we eat with more nourishing seasonal produce. Soups and warming foods. Chai tea has become a favourite.

What else?

🍂 Lighting my candles as the sun goes down.

🍂 Turning on my fairy lights around the fire place and the house.

🍂 Wearing cosy jumpers. And wrapping up in a nice snuggly blanket in the evening. Especially as we’re more mindful about only putting the heating on when we absolutely have to!

And to keep getting outside and going for a nature walk, regardless of the weather. Natural light always lifts my mood and spirit. It is also a time to retreat, however I feel I’ve done enough of that these last few years so I know I am strongly feeling the pull to get out-out.

What do you love about autumn?

Saying Yes To New Adventures

We’re clearing and letting go. This summer has wiped us out. The garden is totally parched and I have been desperately trying to keep everything alive.

The trees are letting go of their burnt and parched leaves, too tired to hold on any longer. Even if it is far too early in the season.

Last night it rained, really rained and we breathed a sigh of relief. We’ve always taken rain for granted in this country. But not this summer. There have been wildfires galore, heartbreaking to see and witness locally and in France where I’ve spent a lot of time enjoying the pine forests.

We’ve been leaving pots and pots of water out to try and help the local wildlife, the birds have had extra food, the squirrels nuts of their own and the fox cubs leftovers that would otherwise go waste. We’ve done everything we can to love and nurture our wildlife tribe.

Is it enough?

Only time will tell.

“May the petals teach me the art of letting go”

— Xan Oku

And as for my beautiful roses, for the first time I’ve collected the petals. Nothing has gone to waste here either.

I’ve carefully dried them and created a new altar along with the sound bowl we love.

Let it go, something beautiful wants to grow in its place

Following nature’s lead I too am letting go, cupboards are being cleaned out, old books passed on for someone else, spaces energetically and physically cleared and refreshed. Dark and dusty corners are now in the light.

And then there’s the inner healing too. Letting go of old ways of being, habits, beliefs, relationships, dreams, identities and so on.

It’s all necessary work.

Now we are facing forwards once more. Welcoming in new, fresh energy and new chapters, new beginnings and have been on an epic journey of awakening and evolving.

One I am saying a big, fat ‘Hell yes’ too!

Keep stepping forward and keep your eyes firmly ahead.

The past is done, gone and we’re not going back.

Ever.

Onwards and upwards.

“You do not need to fear the collapse of the old. The old is falling away and the new is emerging. When we look out into the world we see things looks chaotic, unstable and fearful. Any part of the physical that was created in an old energy is falling away.

We must remember that a new energy is emerging and as long as we look for these new, creative, inspiring ways of doing things there is nothing to fear.

As old structures fall away, new structures are being built. You will always be taken care of as this transition on Earth takes place. Don’t allow fear to overtake you. Trust in the divine plan and know that you are safe. ”

— Rachel's Butterfly Effect

Unearthing Everything That Has Been Hidden

Humanity is changing at a rapid pace. Our views and opinions. Our beliefs and dreams. Ourselves as people. What you believed yesterday, you may no longer believe today. The last couple of years has immersed us into a deep, more soulful awakening making way for the collapse of the old.

Unearthing everything that has been hidden

And then there is the healing - the dark nights of the soul that means we can no longer avoid what is lurking, buried in our shadows or put off what has to be dealt with once and for all.

You may no longer recognise the person you are now. I look back at myself even over the last six months and so much has shifted and changed within and around me.

This is meant to happen and it is an on-going process. You are allowed to change. Everything. Even if it means those around you don't recognise you anymore either. Your evolution is not for anyone else - it's for you.

Sometimes we journey within alone. And sometimes we need our like-minded tribe around us. To be there. To understand. To witness as we shed our old layers. And to support and guide us as we embrace the new.

This is my 13th year being self-employed, when I set out on my path with my first business Scarletta Media in 2009, I did not have a clue what I was doing, or how I was going to achieve what I thought I wanted to achieve. At times it was a lonely path because no one in my friendship circle had chosen this path before.

I quickly became very isolated, but thankfully one of my neighbours encouraged me to join a local networking group, then I met a mentor who ran her own groups specifically for women in business. A small circle just for women. Soulful women. Women who spoke my language, opened my eyes, mind, body and soul to a new way of being and I loved it. And them.

Joining her led to be one of the best things for my business and for my own personal growth. Ever since I have sought out groups of women for all sorts of reasons personally and professionally and have facilitated my own in person and online. It is magical when you find your own tribe.

“The people that are right for you want to see you grow
They want you to feel safe in their presence
They want you to feel seen, heard and loved
Just as you are”

Groups of women coming together is nothing new. It’s ancient and a practice that is becoming more essential for our personal and spiritual growth as the feminine rises once more. As well as being immersed within my own, sometimes totally blinking overwhelming healing path, recently I've been studying and have gained a diploma in the divine feminine, and have made some subtle changes to my services offerings, which are lovingly designed to holistically bring you and your life into bloom and balance the stress of modern day living and working with natural, mindful practices. All fascinating stuff.

And so now I feel it is the ideal time to re-open my own collective. This has evolved into the Collective Retreat - an intimate place for us to to gather, reflect and re-energise together.

I'll be hosting from the Shed, our very own sanctuary space at the bottom of our garden, which is next to an abundance of wildlife in Surrey.

The monthly retreats take place online and are infused with mindful intuitive practices and rituals, to enable you to connect deeply with yourself and rediscover your true nature.

Who are you now?

What do you need to let go of and release?

What are you being called and nudged to create?

What might grow and flourish given your time, love and attention?

This safe online sanctuary is also a place to gather, support, encourage, liberate and empower and if you love being part of a group with other supportive women you will simply grow and thrive here.

The Medicine Woman's Prayer

One of the biggest challenges we all have is facing up to what lies in our shadows.

What lingers underneath the surface?

What will we uncover if only we’d stop and allow ourselves to feel what is there desperate for our attention?

It can be easier not to delve too deeply. To try and carry on as we were.

But our inner voice always has many ways to grab our attention. Dis-ease can manifest, our minds are anxious and will not be calm and we know we are stressed out and living on the edge.

Stopping isn’t an option. We have to keep going.

Whilst chatting with a client recently, she said I cannot meditate, I cannot keep still, I cannot allow myself to stop because if I do, then I know I have to face up to what I’d rather not.

She’s not alone.

And I shared with her that it is at point where we a have a choice and our own free will. Attempt to carry on and try to avoid ourselves?

Or pause and look and listen within?

“I will not rescue you, for you are not powerless.
I will not fix you, for you are not broken.
I will not heal you, for I see you in your wholeness.
I will walk with you through the darkness as you remember your light.”

Pausing and reflecting gives space for healing and transformation

When you decide to allow yourself to pause and reflect only then do you grasp your bravery and courage.

Then you gift yourself the magical opportunity to grieve and begin to heal.

Then you grow more resilience and inner strength and your life begins to shift and change for the better.

Of course there will be setbacks. Nothing is linear.

But you give yourself a chance to surrender, release and let go and this is liberating and empowering.

Transformation takes inner work, a commitment to yourself and a wholehearted willingness to see it through. No one else can do this for you.

What if you surrendered?

What could you release and let go of?

What can you transform?

Sometimes it feels easier to fall back and stay put. But don’t be afraid to face your shadows, your future self will thank you for it.

The Self Care Moments are mindful self care prompts designed to encourage you to:

• Bring back balance between doing and being

• Make you more of a priority

• And to create some much needed ‘me-time’ throughout your day-to-day life so you can reconnect more deeply with yourself

They are simple and effective tweaks, changes and rituals to gently create more space, time and energy especially for you.

The purpose of the moments is to bring you back to yourself, not to add more to-do’s to your list.

You’ll receive four complementary mindful prompts from Melanie, spaced a week apart to give you time to reflect and practice. So to reap the benefits commit and carve dedicated time in your day to read through each moment, ideally first thing in the morning; tune out from everything and everyone around you and spend a moment tuning back into you.

The most empowering thing you can do for yourself is to listen, trust and act as you make more room in your life for YOU

After a While You Learn

Here we are embarking on another change of season, autumn has arrived and last week I felt nothing but resistance and sadness to the colder weather and darker evenings. Being a spring person my inner voice wailed ‘I am not ready for the darkness again, it’s far too soon’. It doesn't really feel as though summer fully arrived this year does it and already we're moving on?

Here in the UK, we've had a few really warm days here and there and plenty of torrential rain and flooding thrown into the mix. One of the things I am working on is to embrace all seasons and I am conscious of getting outside, breathing in some fresh air and being in as much daylight and sunlight as possible. The leaves are changing colour, ready to fall which is stunning.

“After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul.
And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaving and company doesn’t always mean security.
And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts and presents are promises and you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes ahead, with the Grace of a woman not the grief of a child.
And you learn to build all your roads on today, because tomorrows ground is too uncertain for plans and futures have a way of falling down mid-flight.
After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much, so you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers.
And you learn that you really can endure.
You really are strong.
You really do have worth.
You learn and you learn.
And with every goodbye you learn.
”

— Veronica A. Shoffstall

It also didn't feel that we experienced summer as we were blindsided when our beautiful Billyboy cat was diagnosed with lymphoma at the end of May. If you have worked with me or if we've chatted online no doubt you’ll have met Billy. He was a big cat with an even bigger personality and loved nothing more than making his presence known. Regularly sitting on my desk and joining in with the conversations.

You don't choose animals, they choose you

Eight years ago Mr M and I rescued Billy and his sister Lola from a local animal sanctuary. They had been abandoned by their previous owners when they had had a baby.

Animals have an instinctive nature in that we don’t choose them, they cleverly choose us. We'd gone to the animal sanctuary with the intention to adopt two ginger cats. But as soon as I walked into their pen Billy came over to me, sat on my lap and settled down. As we were ushered in to see other cats I could see Billy and Lola patiently waiting at the glass door watching our every move. So I knew we had to go back and see them. Somehow they instinctively knew it was Mr M who needed a little more persuasion and quickly surrounded him and brushed up against his legs. Needless to say it didn't take long before our decision was made. We adopted them and they both came to live with us in their forever home.

We swiftly became a family of four, Billy and Lola needed a lot of tender loving care and rescued us just as much as we rescued them. When we moved to our current home Billy loved nothing more than being outside helping and watching me in the garden. This was his patch, with the abundance of wildlife on offer there was always a bird, mouse or squirrel to keep him entertained.

And so when we received the devastating diagnosis, yet again we were thrown into merely existing day-to-day, taking care of Billy, being with him, relishing the little time we had left all together and fulfilling our promise that we'd never abandon him.

Mr M and I both utterly heartbroken cradled our beautiful boy until he sadly took his last breath.

Life as we knew it ground to a halt.

Again.

During the last two years we've all been repeatedly letting go

Let go of someone or something.

Let go of loved ones.

Let go of careers.

Let go of relationships.

Let go of homes.

Let go of hopes and dreams.

Let go of habits.

Let go of what no longer serves you.

Let go of what was.

Let go. Clear. Release. Repeat.......

And so this summer enforced another life lesson upon us in letting go and simply trusting that all we could do was be with Billy, surround him with all the love and comfort we could and stay with him until the end came.

When we collected Billy and Lola from the sanctuary we made them a promise that we would never leave or abandon them. And our only comfort is that we didn’t ever break that promise. The lymphoma ravaged his body in three short months and when it was sadly time, we had absolutely no other choice but to let him go.

No one is immune from the cycles of life and loss. No one. And yet grief remains a lonely path

So of course following a loss we are submerged into grief. Grief can be triggered by all sorts of life changes – not only the death of a loved one and it isn’t something that can be avoided or ignored. There is so much we are all grieving for right now.

Grief is a personal unique journey that carries its own flame. We try to avoid talking about grief, because it is painful, dark and relentless. But the more we can talk about grief, the more others connect with our loss. Especially if they have suffered a similar loss.

A loss is also a sacred time, one to be acknowledged and honoured. As we move through grief, only then do we heal. And when the time feels right, eventually our inner strength sees us through and enables us to pick up the reins of our lives again. This is a slow process that needs as much time and space as it needs. It cannot be rushed.

I've stopped trying to fathom out why things happen how they do. I am learning to stop resisting change and to work on letting go and allowing life to take me where it will. I've stopped believing I have total control over my entire destiny. And in so doing I trust all will be well. My internal flame will reignite and bring me back to myself.

Eventually.

Let go. And let go some more

The first step is to decide to let go. Maybe you want to create a ritual or a ceremony. It is essential to do whatever feels right to you in the moment. Honouring your loss aids healing. No pushing or striving is required, just a deep trust in yourself and the powers that be that the wheels of life will continue to turn. Life will roll on.

When you let go and go with the flow you gently come back to life altered and armed with new inner knowledge and life lessons ready to take you onto the next chapter and life cycle. This doesn't mean you ever forget or get over your loss. You just find your way to live with your loss.

Let every new season teach you what it was meant to teach you

Somehow miraculously this week the energy has shifted. Can you feel it too? We are being called to retreat and go inwards once more and despite not being an autumn person, this week feels lighter and brighter. The new season is ready to unfold.

“We have seasons when we flourish and seasons when the leaves falls from us, revealing our bare bones. Given time, they grow again.”

— Wintering – Katherine May

So as the season shifts I am loving my new Seven Twilights candles to bring courage, wisdom, and strength, warm chai tea, cosy jumpers, my new journals and our brand new retreat and sanctuary space in the garden a.k.a “The Shed”.

The Shed is nestled at the bottom of our garden, currently being painted and feels the perfect retreat space for being together and watching the stunning golden sunsets as Mr M, Lola and I re-adjust to a very different way of living together now as our tribe of three.

And as for our beloved Billyboy, we all miss him desperately and know and trust his spirit lives on and remains here with us albeit just behind the veil.

I hope this season finds you well and that you too can let go of whatever you need to let go of.

Maybe, just maybe this Autumn won’t be quite so bad after all?!

Are you ready to tune in, come back to you and listen and act on your inner whispers?

Then let’s work together.

Let Yourself Rest

We are at the midway turning point through the year in the northern hemisphere and this is an ideal time to stop, pause and reflect on where you've been and where you'd like to head next.

Despite being six months in to 2021 it still feels as if this year hasn't yet had the opportunity to get fully started. Everything feels topsy-turvy in the UK, within the space of a few days Mother Nature suddenly bloomed around us and our roses looked and smelt incredible in our garden. Finally summer arrived with a bang and intense heat, but overnight the atmosphere changed and was followed by dramatic torrential storms and downpours that cleansed the air and energy around us.

The beautiful roses battered by the storm let go and shed their petals. But now there are an abundance of buds patiently waiting to come back into bloom.

Just like the seasons and elements we humans are topsy-turvy too taking small steps forwards, only to find ourselves stepping right back and retreating and this merry dance is occurring repeatedly. We too are patiently waiting.

And so it comes as no surprise to me chatting to other friends, family and within my social community that there is the feeling of collective exhaustion and weariness.

Our hearts and souls have been through a traumatic and uncertain time, and as we begin to take tentative steps and reflect on our journeys now we can comprehend the grieving, healing and acceptance required for us to let go and attempt to move our lives forwards.

With well over a year in and out of lockdown and opening up only to close down again and again our inner strength, resilience and patience is continuously being tested. For some life hasn't changed whereas for others it's changed irrevocably. And this is inevitably taking its toll on our emotional and mental well-being.

““If you’re exhausted rest.
If you don’t feel like starting a new project, don’t.
If you don’t feel the urge to make something new, just rest in the beauty of the old, the familiar, the known.
If you don’t feel like talking stay silent.
If you’re fed up with the news turn it off.
If you want to postpone something until tomorrow, do it.
If you want to do nothing, do nothing today.
Feel the fullness of the emptiness, the vastness of the silence, the sheer life in your unproductive moments.
Time does not always need to be filled
You are enough simply in your being.”
”

— Radiant Women

For me personally this year has been a struggle, it has been intense for many reasons. For several months I seemed to have the look of a shocked rabbit caught in the headlights, whilst anxiously worrying about what we'd have to deal with next whizzing through my brain. I know I am not alone. Many of us are feeling the impact of living life on the edge for quite some time.

Despite having plenty of go-to well-being tools and techniques in my own spiritual toolbox, I've needed more deeper healing and restorative rest than ever before, as I focused my limited energy on overcoming insomnia, anxiety and mental exhaustion (and a few peri-menopause symptoms thrown into the mix too!). This has taken my understanding of proper rest, self care and self compassion to an entirely new level.

So is it any wonder our frazzled nervous systems long for a well earned rest?

We are immersed within a culture that positively encourages endless doing and high achieving productivity.

Surely you can cram in more, quicker and faster? This doing is masculine energy.

Being chronically tired, stressed and burnt out is just the norm. Regardless of what our bodies, minds and souls are repeatedly warning us, we carry on.

Until we can't.

When you feel the pressure to speed up – choose to slow down as it’s time for a rest revolution

When I feel anxious I tend to do more and fill the time with doing. When what I really need to do is stop doing and allow myself to be. However uncomfortable this feels at the time. Being is feminine energy.

Resting is not about catching up on lost sleep, deep restorative rest is necessary to recover and prevent burn-out and comes in various forms such as physical, mental, creative, emotional or spiritual.

Ideally we need to build more rest time into our day-to-day habits and rituals before we feel completely depleted. Small acts of rest and self care can be built into our day, without waiting for a chunk of time to go on holiday.

What is restful to me, may not be to you, however through-out the pandemic we are understanding the simple power of being outside, immersed in nature and this is always my go-to to revive my energy.

Making time and space for rest needs to be a priority in our lives because deep rest is essential to our collective healing and recovery. And the biggest takeaway of all - not feel guilty about it!

So as we continue to move through our own experiences here's what I have been reminded of:

• Honour your feelings, experience and limitations. It may well differ from those around you, and this is OK.

• Trust your intuition and common sense to do whatever feels good to you. Despite what anyone else says or does.

• Gift yourself permission to rest for as long as it takes. Make your resting time non-negotiable.

We can slow down and still move gently forward in life

“ Can you see and feel we have to learn the power of deep rest?
We need to nurture ourselves in order to move forwards slowly and gently.
We can let go of the reins and allow what falls away, in order to create space for the new to be birthed and flow.
Choose to create and realign with your new rhythm.
This is the power of the feminine.”

— Melanie Mackie

I believe we have been given an opportunity to say no thanks to the endless pushing, busyness and striving and instead can choose a new nourishing rhythm to how we live and work, one that places us and our well-being first and not last.

It is only when we create and allow the necessary time and space for rest that we can feel fully back to ourselves. We are grounded, centred in our hearts and bodies, our inner flame reignites and burns brightly once more; clarity and inspiration speaks to us intuitively as our creativity and enthusiasm for life returns. And only then does life feel a little easier and flows again with more ease.

Now the density of the fog has dispersed...

My own path has become clearer, I feel I am facing forwards again. Thanks to homeopathy I am sleeping, feel less anxious and am mindful of my energy levels and when I need to take a breather.

In addition to learning more about the importance of deep rest I have been studying and have qualified with a diploma in divine feminine practices to aid mindful healing, rejuvenation and recovery. Along with my mindfulness stress based reduction certification (MBSR) all of this wisdom is now incorporated within my nature led mentoring services.

After an intense and traumatic time for so many of us globally I know this is where my work is being called to support now, mentoring those who are choosing to reconnect more deeply with themselves at heart and soul level and to find new ways to intentionally overcome all of life’s challenges.

Throughout the summer I am offering mindful online mentoring sessions to support you on your journey so far, where you are now and where you'd love to be.

If of interest you can book an online session together here.

Make space in your plans for doing and simply being

Whilst out purchasing some gift wrap in a local stationery shop recently the assistant offered me a free 2021 calendar. They had stacks available and she said no one wanted them. I thought about it briefly and politely declined.

As I left the store I realised living-day-to-day has become my sole focus. I am all for living in the moment, however I no longer dared to make any future plans. I wondered why? Why have I stopped envisioning my future? Why am I not trusting myself to make new plans?

And so a few days later I went back to the shop to purchase something else and noticed the free calendars. They still had plenty available. "Every garden is a little piece of nature” caught my eye. It was waiting patiently for me so that moment felt a poignant nudge from the Universe - come on Mel trust yourself to make some plans.....

The calendar is now on full display on my kitchen wall and I am starting to add my plans to it, trusting what will be will be. And if there are any more setbacks or delays, well I'll deal with it then. I am also planning more time for rest and to just be. Keeping an eye on balancing with all the doing.

It's time to gently start living and flowing with life again, do you feel it too?

“We must carve out little pockets of joy in our ordinary days. We must find sunshine. We must find rest without feeling guilty about resting. It’s so important to know what makes you feel good, to know what you must do each day to keep yourself feeling well.

We must stop glamourising neglecting our well-being as a sacrifice for more achievement, to consume more, achieve more, to have more. Life is happening whether we are noticing it all or not and if we don’t take time to notice, stop, pause, enjoy, savor and slow down then a day becomes a week, then a month, then a whole life - missed.

Notice your life. Be alive to it all. Stop waiting for the savoring. You’ve done enough. Enjoy for a while.”

— Jamie Varon

I Believe In You

As the year winds to a close many including me are breathing a sigh of relief, I am not big on celebrating new year but there is no doubt this is a year many of us are glad to see the back of as life has tried and tested us and our resilience repeatedly in ways none of us could have envisaged only twelve months ago.

The unrelenting grief and trauma has left a residue of collective weariness that makes it hard to recognise anything good to come out of 2020. Many aspects of my own life are unrecognisable and sadly as a family and for some of our friends we’ve all lost loved ones far too soon.

Retreating and reflection have been high on my agenda as personally I chose to step away from social media day-to-day, made the conscious decision to pause my business and services for the time being and tried to do my best to avoid getting publicly caught up in the battles over who breaks the lockdown rules, where and with whom. What I will say is that it is abundantly clear that there are those who continue to make sacrifices for the greater good of all.

And those who don’t.

I know which camp I am in especially as we are not out of the pandemic woods yet.

We instead of Me

On the upside this year brought us a greater sense of community as we’ve been able to get to know more of our neighbours both of the human and animal kind. We’ve consciously chosen to support local businesses and the community and environmental initiatives on our doorstep.

I have walked and walked and walked some more - seemingly always in a pair of wellies. Seeing every change in season and being outdoors has done wonders for my sanity and waistline!

Loneliness and isolation are prevalent for many of us and so I feel fortunate to have my own trusted “support bubble” which is a tight, supportive and loving tribe carefully filled with my immediate family and a handful of friends old and new.

We’ve closed ranks as this year has shaken the foundations of all our lives in many different ways; we are adapting and adjusting as we go along. The pandemic has had a severe impact on our work, incomes or businesses, tested our relationships and of course been an incredibly anxious time overall as we continuously try to keep ourselves and our loved ones safe and healthy.

Just “Being” there with each other in heart, mind and spirit online - even if we cannot see each other in person has been essential in helping us all cope.

Where did my life go?

Over the summer months one of my friends asked me what I was doing with my business and urged me to keep showing up and said that my voice and work is needed. Being in the depths of the pandemic abyss at the time all I could think about was what the hell happened to my life?

I had little in the way of wisdom or guidance to offer anyone including myself and therefore begged to differ. Like so many of us it has been about getting through each day and keeping ourselves afloat hasn’t it? And so for the first time in my life I placed more importance on my private home life and in taking care of my own physical, emotional and mental self. None of us can pour or help others from an empty cup, can we?

This has not been the time to continuously push or strive, so I have embraced the opportunity to step back, pause and reflect and spend what precious little energy I have left for taking care of our immediate needs. Everything else will and can wait a little longer.

You’re exactly where you need to be. Right here and right now.

It can be hard to accept what has and continues to unfold but I have repeatedly heard from several different sources that nothing happens by accident – we are all exactly where we are meant to be. We are not going backwards to a world we once knew - but creating a new awakened, world of light. And this all takes time and patience to unfold.

2020 may have shattered and fragmented the lives we once had to pieces, but you can believe and trust yourself to forge a new way forward.

New year is never a time to push on with endless goals and to-do’s. Spring is the time to emerge!

So for now just go gently forwards as you deal with one day and one step at a time.

That’s enough for now.

Note to self

Every year I create my own vision book filled with intentions, hopes, dreams and wishes. Back in early March before the full force of the pandemic took hold I wrote a note to myself.

Flicking back through the book and reflecting on what was good about 2020 I hadn’t realised the significance of these words to myself at the time.

Nine months on I needed to be reminded of the sentiment behind them more than ever.

And so as another new year begins be hopeful that wherever you are and whatever you currently face believe this will not last forever.

I believe in you

When you’re full of self-doubt, fear and worry – I believe in you

When you feel uncertain of the future and out of control – I believe in you

When you can’t see a way out – I believe in you to find the solution

When you feel the world is against you – I believe in you and will always have your back

When you feel ready to give up – I believe in you to get back up

When you feel afraid and unloved – I believe in you and always love you

Because I believe in you.

And you can believe in you too.